Just who do you think you are, eh?
Operating from a secret underground wool-lined bunker in the heart of the busy metropolis of London Knit the City’s Yarn Corps spend most of their lives operating under assumed names and living their lives like normal people.
You could sit next to one of them on the tube or tut overdramatically behind them at the ticket barrier when their Oyster card doesn’t work.
Most of the information on the Yarn Corps members is classified but here are the details we have so far:
Mysteriously turned to the darkside of the Knit one fateful night. Mild-mannered Miss X fell asleep on a London Underground train and barely escaped the dreaded ‘tube sanitiser’ with her life. Details of how she made her escape are unclear, but since that night part of her awoke as Deadly Knitshade.
Instilled with eerie knitting powers. She is subject to constant unexpected ‘knitblasts’ leaving woolly debris around the city. She struggles to control her knits, which seem to have taken on a life of their own, appearing at times in the least expected places. It is her yarn-flavoured burden to bear.
Both sides of her personality are known to mysterious leave gifts of cheese in underground platform shadows. No real explanation for this has been found.
Tired of a life of corsets, croquet and gaudy high society, Lady Loop fled the confines of the English gentry by thumbing her way down the M1 with a lorry driver named Jonny.
Once in London town she got hooked on yarn in the capital’s underground knitting bars and now spends her days hitchhiking back up to the English countryside and siphoning wool from the rare-breed sheep of private estates.
By day she spins it into beautiful yarns, by night she knits it up and roams the streets looking for places to show off her ill-gotten knitted wares.
Shorn-a the Dead
Ever since then, she’s been on a quest to clothe London’s public statuary, one legwarmer at a time. Her weapon of choice is a tasty possum-merino blend.
Having recently returned from exile on faraway shores for crimes against children’s TV, this crafty lass spent her time forced to create using found objects and the local yen store.
After opening a mysterious box of fastenings in a dimly lit back alley shop she was transformed as zips, buttons and embellishments started to attach themselves to her. Since that day she has become The Fastener.
Her lightning-fast knitting powers helping her spread her woolly joy on returning home.
Inactive Yarn Corps Members:
Taken from the streets as a child, she was trained to become one of the world’s most deadly assassins.
Until one day, she decided that avenging crimes committed against bare landscapes was a far worthier cause.
She spells out revenge with a stroke of her needle. Defying the orders of her superiors, she now dedicates her skills to making the city a place of woolly harmony.
It’s a time of change. No longer shall the city lack woolly integrity.
Knitting Ninja has not been seen on the yarnstorming scene for some time. Rumours are she has gone to seek her yarny destiny in the Far East.